On this episode of Investing for Freedom, Mike talks to network marketer and coach Jen Szpigiel. Mike and Jen discuss Jen’s background, how to deal with the negativity around network marketing, and much more. Enjoy!
I’m Jen Szpigiel. A mom of four, a wife to my soul mate and a serial entrepreneur. In 2003, I left my corporate marketing career to be a stay-at-home-mom. While I loved being home with my kids, I had this burning desire to set goals and create a life of my dreams. This voice in my head was too loud to ignore.
I jumped right in by starting a health and wellness business within the network marketing industry that grew quickly and generated millions of dollars in commissions, trips and rewards. I was invited to start speaking on stages globally and training thousands of women to live on purpose and dive into personal leadership.
Today, as a Certified Health Coach, Certified Life Coach, and Business Coach, I’m here to help you rise. In business and life.
0:00 – Intro
1:54 – Jen explains how she has had the greatest impact on her own life
5:35 – Looking within is the one thing that has had the greatest impact on Jen’s life
7:46 – Personal growth is a journey within itself according to Jen
10:15 – Jen explains her ideal client when she is coaching
12:08 – Mike asks Jen what her greatest setback was and what she learned from it
14:35 – Jen explains what the advice she finds herself sharing the most
16:11 – Jen gives some tips on what she does to keep herself in the present moment
19:42 – Jen uses music to change her mindstate
21:07 – Jen thinks men are great at changing state whereas women tend to be eaten by guilt
22:45 – Becoming a better parent is very individual
24:18 – Jen talks about her background and how she got to where she is today
31:37 – A lot of people suppress the rumbling feeling when they’re not in the place they need to be
35:55 – Jen talks about how her mentor asked her if she took herself out of her work how many people could she impact
38:46 – Jen talks about network marketing and some of the negative ideas of it
43:08 – Jen tells us about how she’s had a lot of backlash to her network marketing business
44:54 – Jen talks about what’s going on inside her mind and what she’s processing in 2020
48:35 – Mike asks how do we get back to that warrior mentality and restore our hope
FIND | JEN:
Mike Ayala: Thank you for joining me on the Investing for Freedom podcast. I am so excited for our guest today. My wife and I were on Jen’s podcast a few weeks ago and the inner energy was just amazing. And so, I’m super excited about being able to flip the script and have Jen on the show and here’s what’s even more amazing. I don’t know Jen very well, but I’ve just followed her for a little bit and she’s a powerhouse and I’m really excited because in the future, we’re going to start bringing on some more women. And we were just having a conversation before we started recording about women. And it’s just crazy because maybe I’m just, maybe my eyes are just open to it, but I think women are like, they’re taking the world by storm and I’m super excited about it. And I’m just excited to get into the conversation. Jen’s got an amazing background, which I won’t get into right now, but just stay tuned because I think this episode is going to bring a ton of value. So, Jen, I appreciate you being on the podcast.
Jen Szpigiel: Thanks Mike. I appreciate being here. I really do. It’s a beautiful time together and I enjoyed our first conversation. So, I’m excited to expand on that.
Mike Ayala: So, it was fun. And it’s Jen Szpigiel, right? Did I say that right?
Jen Szpigiel: Yeah. You did, good job. That’s a mouthful that one.
Mike Ayala: Well, my wife has said your name so many times that I figured I’d get it right.
Jen Szpigiel: Appreciate that.
Mike Ayala: She is a huge fan.
Jen Szpigiel: Thank you.
Mike Ayala: So, let’s get into the four questions. So, who’s had the greatest impact on your life.
Jen Szpigiel: You know, Mike, I, I saw this question and the response that was given to me, I had to like meditate and pray on. I’ll be honest with you because I don’t think it’s conventional. I have amazing parents. So, my dad is very, business-focused just like one of those incredible work ethic gentlemen who taught me so much in terms of spreading myself and breaking boundaries and going out there and doing the best job I can. And then my mom is this incredible servant leader who gave me that servant heart and love for people and have incredible facilitators in my life. And I was having such a difficult time choosing one. And the answer kept coming back to Jen, It’s you. You have been the person who has inspired and continue to work through things. And you have been that one that’s created who you are today and the excitement for who you’re becoming. So don’t know if anybody’s ever given you that answer, but I just, I sat on it before we started recording to thinking there’s got to be a person, but I keep coming back to myself.
Mike Ayala: You know, it’s so interesting. And I don’t want to spend too much time on this because there’s so much value to get into, but you’re not the first person that’s given that answer. And it’s really got me thinking around you know, and for our audiences listening, I think there’s an important lesson there because at the end of the day, we’ve got so many guides and mentors and people in our lives, but at the end of the day, I mean this is a great example of at end of the day it’s you. What you do with that information, what you go out to do with the world, all of that, it’s all about you. So actually, episode one, who’s probably one of my favorite mentors in the world. He said the same thing. It was him, David Osborne.
Jen Szpigiel: Oh, beautiful. Yeah. And I think it’s because you get to a point in your life where you look back and you realize your resilience, you realize your strength and you realize that the affirmation that you’re looking for often from the outside, it’s got to come from within. And that was a huge journey for me. And it was a messy one, but I’ve gotten here, and I feel good about saying that too Mike, to be honest with you, because that’s taken a lot to get to that point.
Mike Ayala: Yeah. Well, and it’s such a valuable lesson for all of us to hear. We’re so programmed to, it’s interesting, because you were saying something, I listened to your first episode on the becoming iconic podcast, and you were talking about, you know, what does iconic mean? And you said something, the definition as a woman, it made you a little bit uncomfortable. Because you’re told, and it’s not just women I don’t think, but, you know, you’re told, don’t speak, be quiet, speak when spoken to, but there’s so, I don’t think it’s just a woman problem. I mean, we’re so beat down in the world. And so, there’s a lesson here I think from you, you’re the only one that’s going to make that happen. And at the end of the day, if you don’t grab that confidence and become iconic, as you talk about like that’s in your own hands.
Jen Szpigiel: It is.
Mike Ayala: I appreciate that.
Jen Szpigiel: Well, thank you. I appreciate that. And you know, the interesting thing is that it is a journey and I think we can constantly be hiring and Hey, here I am a coach. So, I’m living that life, but I also have realized I’m an assister. So, I assist you in creating the highest version of yourself. It is not my job to make that happen, to action that I get just to facilitate that evolution. And that really helped me, even as I was hiring mentors and coaches to realize it’s not their job to give me my answers and to provide all the details and strategy, their job is just to unravel and reveal within me, these beautiful things that I can go and make unique in my own.
Mike Ayala: I love that you’re an assister. I love it. So good. If you could narrow it down to one thing that has had the greatest impact on your success, what would that be? Jen.
Jen Szpigiel: That is, I’m just going back to what I said earlier, for sure. Looking within. I spent up until about two years ago, Mike, most of my life looking for people to applaud me or recognize me or tell me I was doing a good job. And it was exhausting, because you’re always searching for someone to Pat you on the back. And that was just in my, the way I was raised. You know, I just was raised from a little girl just seeking that affirmation, that attention. And it was a really exhausting existence to be honest. And a lot of times you’re let down because it’s not other people’s job to make you feel good about yourself. And so, I just leaned into this like radical self-acceptance 2 years ago, went on this really deep journey because I’ve always loved personal growth and development. I’ve lived in that space for almost two decades, but there’s a big shift that happens from reading a great book and getting great ideas and then going deep into who you are and working on those wounds, those things about yourself, the blueprints that sometimes we want to ignore and leave under the carpet. Cause that’s where they feel good. It didn’t feel good to go down this journey. But then when I realized how powerful you can be, when you really fully love yourself, it’s not being full of yourself, loving yourself. That’s when you become unstoppable, because the outside world ends up being a compliment to the things you’re doing. Not that foundation, the staple to every single decision you make.
Mike Ayala: Do you think that people know how painful and how much hard work it’s going to be in that keeps them from getting into it? Or do you think people just have no clue? Cause I’ve talked to so many people that don’t, you know, they don’t even read, you were talking about a book and that’s like just entry level. Like most people won’t even read to begin to change themselves, but getting an environments, coaches, mentors, you know, having a life coach, I’m sure we’ll get into this later, but even you know, network marketing and being part of a team, do you think people just don’t understand or do you think they avoid it?
Jen Szpigiel: That’s a great question. It’s a thought-provoking question. I almost feel like personal growth is a journey within itself. When I became super successful in my first business, I lived in the story. I don’t have time to read a book. You know, people kept saying, read books and grow yourself. I think I’m growing myself. I’m stepping into leadership. I’m growing this big business here. What are you all talking about? I’m a mom, who has time to sit on the couch and flip pages, but it caught up to me and it wasn’t pretty because my business then superseded who I was. And that’s when you’re trying to catch up to your business, it can be an ugly time and there’s eyeballs on you. So, I didn’t develop the skills to be able to stand in the posture of this big business. I was 31 years old. I mean, you look back, it’s a baby, that’s a baby making incredible income. And then I thought, oh man, I got to do something here. I have to grow my leadership. This is messy. I don’t like how it feels. And so, I dove in, but that wasn’t even good enough reading a book. And I remember my dad was pivotal in this. I read you’re a badass by Jen Sincero and I just loved the book. It was just one of those books. It just feels good. And I put it down as, Oh, it’s so good. And he said, well, what was so good about it? Tell me, like, share with me. And I said, I don’t know. I just, it made me feel good. And I realized I finished that book, and I had no takeaways that were, I was applying. I couldn’t even explain the lessons because I hadn’t absorbed them. It just, it was the feeling. And I think personal growth can be a feeling that we get addicted to. And then I shifted into journaling while I was reading as I didn’t want to have that comment come out of my mouth again, when I was trying to share some great information, somebody says, tell me all about it. And I think, I don’t know. It just made me feel good. So, I started journaling. And what that developed into are these beautiful nuggets. And it’s actually now the journals I’m going to leave to my kids. Because I’d rather them see all these gold nuggets, these beautiful pieces of wisdom that I was able to receive and absorb while reading these books, I’d rather leave that than a journal of all my mess. And I just think that’s a cool legacy, but it’s definitely evolved. It started just with this resistance, then reading and not really absorbing then to journaling. And now, I mean, I’m in the deep end, I do whatever I can to grow myself on a deeper level.
Mike Ayala: Wow. And so, you do a lot of coaching now. You’re heavily involved in that space. Who’s your, like, who’s your ideal client? Who are you looking for?
Jen Szpigiel: So, I kind of fit into two categories and the neat thing about this, I think because I’m so seasoned in coaching, I’ve been doing it for so long. It comes to a point where your reputation, people know who you are, what you have to offer. And it’s really evolving based on the clients I currently have. They’re basically driving the bus for me, telling me this is what I need. So, I have two different places. I sit because they both bring out different pieces of me, but I also love serving both. So, one, it would be that entrepreneur who’s really wanting to solidify a five figure business. So, what I mean by that is maybe they’re making $500, a $1000 a month and it’s, they’re on the cusp of a breakthrough. They know they can do more, but there’s just those things that are holding them back. Self-Limiting beliefs. Maybe it’s a tweak or shift or a pivot. So, I love working with them because they’re hungry. You know, those are those newer entrepreneurs who just are, they see the dream, they want it and they’re willing to do the work. So, I definitely am very seasoned at building those five figure income earners. So, building somebody from that to up to $10,000 a month, and then I have my elite clients and those are my six plus figure income earners who generally they’re the ones pivoting or expanding. So, they’ve had that monetary success. They’ve been in that for a while. They’ve been comfortable and now they’re ready to do something different. So, they need that coach just to kind of push them out on the skinny branch, because once you’ve had success and Mike, you would know this. Once you have success, it’s really easy to get comfortable in that success and just sit there. And so, I know for myself, that was what pushed me onto the skinny branch in 2020 was getting some coaches to say, what about if you tried this or expanded into that? And it’s been fun. I love the fun part of that.
Mike Ayala: That’s cool. What was your greatest setback and what did you learn from it?
Jen Szpigiel: For sure my greatest setback has been sitting in my story for too long, and this is a very fresh thing for me. It’s as a matter of fact, it was just Monday evening that I had one of the biggest revelations I’ve had in my entire life. I have an incredible coach right now. And we were talking and she was writing, gets you to write out your, I am statements and I am committed to, and I keep going back to those old stories of when someone hurt me or when this happened to me and poor me. And I don’t, I don’t say it in that way anymore. I’ve definitely moved beyond the victim mentality, but I still keep going back to that like, Oh, look at me, I’m the comeback queen. I went through all these things and I’m done. That was a part of creating who I am today, but I will no longer make decisions or statements about myself on who I was. Going forward I will forever make decisions on who I’m becoming, that person and the 5 to 10 years from now, what would she do or say? What would be her I am statement or commitment statement? And that lesson of taking this long to get to that realization, it was a little long. Sometimes that can be a hard student, but I also realized it had to come, so I could show gratitude for those things that felt really hard in the times that they were in my life.
Mike Ayala: I mean that right there is gold. I had to write that down and highlight it, making decisions based on who I’m becoming. That’s so crazy. It’s interesting.
Jen Szpigiel: Well, even in the moment, Mike, if you make a decision today on who we are in this very moment, it still won’t be our highest self. We’ll still have the tendency to look in the rear-view mirror of the things that have happened, or we’ll make decisions based on yesterday’s decisions or consequences. Instead, I want to just fully embody her or him. Whoever’s listening, you know, fully embody that person and those decisions we’ll make will be so different.
Mike Ayala: That’s so good. I find myself saying this all the time, but you know, getting stuck in the future is as bad as getting stuck in the past. You know, I’m trying to lean more into the present, but you’ve got my mind like spinning about, you know, who I’m becoming. That’s, that’s a very interesting position to come from. I love it. What is the piece of advice you find yourself sharing the most?
Jen Szpigiel: Just that. And what I’d like to do is expand on that. If I may and say, just comment on what you just said. I think there’s something so beautiful and harmonious as a successful person. When you can live in the moment and enjoy your child’s laughter, touch your partner’s hand and hold their hand on the couch, be grateful for what’s in the bank account right now, that harmony is what I believe we’re all seeking at the end of the day, more than anything else. And so, when we can really embody that, but then the decision-making be that version. I think that’s when we feel unstoppable, untouchable. I think that’s when our hearts start to really expand and grow because it’s like, ah, it’s so good what we’ve got already because we live in a world where we can turn our taps on and drink water. Maybe it’s not the filtered water you prefer we’re spoiled, but there are other people today walking miles, just to have a drink of water, guys, we got to stop sometimes and just realize what’s around us. And there’s that urgency for more. And I love that. I love that burn in my belly too, but sometimes we have to ground ourselves in the what is.
Mike Ayala: Can you give us some, I love, love, love this. Can you give us some practical things you do to keep yourself in that place? Because you know, it’s one thing to walk away, listening to this podcast and get all excited and I’m going to be more present, but what are some of the practical things you do to keep yourself there?
Jen Szpigiel: I have like, I’m very, very guarded and disciplined in these ways. So, number one is every time I check my bank account. So if I know money has come in or I’m getting paid in some capacity, before I look, I always without fail, say thank you for whatever amount that is I’m grateful and thank you. And when I started that practice, my income expanded exponentially. Every time I opened up that bank account, it was always more than I anticipated. It was such a beautiful practice. And even if it’s less than so you may listen. Well, that’s nice for you. It’s a little less than I would care for, but if you can be grateful for what you have today, open that account and go, gosh, even if there’s $10, there’s $10 in there, then it has the capacity to expand, we’ve got to be grateful for what we have in the moment. The other thing is I’m very strict with my boundaries in terms of my phone. I will not touch my phone in the mornings until my kids are off to school. And I turn my phone off an hour before my kids get home because I found, and I know any online entrepreneur, this will resonate with you that transition from entrepreneur to parent or spouse or just relationships in general. I was really having, like I was hitting the wall with that. I was having a hard time cutting that part of me off and opening up this next part of me. So, I needed to scale back and go a whole hour before the kids and my husband get home. I put music on, I may even meditate. So, I’m still in a state of growth and sitting with myself, but I am very, when they come off the bus. It’s so joyful now to be like welcome home versus them coming home to a mom that was like, I’m just finishing off a call. I shushed my kids for a long time, Mike, and you know, it is what it is. I know better now. I didn’t, that’s the best what I knew in that moment, looking back, would I have changed things? Yeah, I would have, but it’s all a part of my journey in my learning.
Mike Ayala: You know, I have a couple of things I want to talk about there, but even just with COVID and the zoom and everybody being at home, I have noticed such a big shift in people like, you know, we were in team meetings and the kids are crawling up on our controller’s lap. And you know, at first everybody’s like freaking out, but we’re, there’s so many good things that have come of it. And just bringing the kids into our world is one of them. But what you just said is so powerful. And I was at a front row dads’ event, I don’t know, two months ago, which is just a group of guys that want to be better dads and better husbands. And this guy was talking about how on his commute home, or he would get home. So, he had like a 45-minute drive. He would get home. He would come in and he needed this downtime. He needed 15 or 20 minutes. And so, they created this time where he could go be alone or whatever, and it wasn’t working because the mom was now working, and she was stressed out. And it was a simple, somebody said something so simple. They’re like, well, you said you have a 35-minute commute or whatever the time was like, why don’t you use that time to unwind? And he’s like, well, that’s my time to listen to audio books and podcasts. And it’s like, well, what’s your priority? You know, but our minds get so stuck in this program, the way that we think things are that we make a bunch of excuses around it. And so, I love what you said about becoming an hour. So, you take an hour to become that better version of a parent.
Jen Szpigiel: I do. And I have some pretty wicked playlist. So, music is my love language. And I love dancing in the kitchen. I’m singing forever. My kids, that drives them nuts, but that changes my state. And I just believe in music. I think it’s one of those life’s miracles that we take for granted. I mean, there are only seven notes in music. I mean, not counting flats and sharps, and we have millions upon millions of sounds and songs. Just spend time in that, and you can change your complete mood with a song. So, I do agree with that. And I say on your way home, a lot of times we just need music, decompress. Sometimes we’re consuming, consuming, consuming, and I was guilty of that. I totally know how that feels. And you’re feeling like I’m trying my best. I’m doing my best. I’m learning, I’m growing, but there’s a but, but who’s suffering. Are you suffering in your relationships in your home? Is your, are your kids or your spouse suffering because you haven’t taken that time to decompress, open up and be excited to see their faces.
Mike Ayala: So, I don’t want to, I don’t want to pick on the men, but do you think women are naturally better than men at this? Like, what’s your, because I’m just sitting here thinking, I’m wondering if like men are saying, you know, picturing themselves dancing around the kitchen and changing their state. And the one thing that I’ll say is Tony Robbins, right? Like, he’s always talking about changing your state. So, is this, is this easier for women or men just kind of closed off to this, do you think?
Jen Szpigiel: No, I think, I actually think men are great at this to be honest with you. I find as women, we are constantly in the emotion of guilt. We’re guilty when we’re working, Oh, maybe we should be more of a parent or more of a wife, and then we’re being a parent or a wife. Oh, I should be. I say, always say, we should all over ourselves. Men seem to be able to put things in these compartments. I just am fascinated by it. I just look at my husband like, man, like you just went from work and now you’re doing dad. Now he likes to dance with me. So that’s probably why it works in our house, but it could be gangster rap and putting your, you know, your car seat back a bit with one hand on the steering wheel and feeling the vibe, whatever works for you. Or it could be just pure silence. Sometimes I think we underestimate that too. No music, no podcast, a quiet car. Oh, that actually sounds heavenly. I don’t get that very often.
Mike Ayala: Yeah. It’s interesting. You know, another conversation that has come up lately in another group that I’m in with dads is, you know, we put so much time in it and I don’t think this is just a dad thing. It was just happened to be a group of guys, but we put so much energy and time into our leadership teams and prepping for our meetings and all of this stuff. But again, on that theme, like we don’t put nearly enough time into, you know, transitioning and being the dad at the table or being the leader in the family. And I wonder, I wonder what that, I wonder in your mind, like how do we become better parents? How do we put as much energy into our family and that version of us as we do our careers.
Jen Szpigiel: So, I feel like it’s so individual, you know, in my home, my husband is more of the one nurturing the family. I have, he met me as a career woman. So, he kind of took on that role of being home and helping around the house. Actually, he was home with me raising the kids for six years and then he just, was he like anybody, man, or woman, if that’s all you’re doing, eventually you’ve had enough. So, he’s gone out and got a job, just, you know, to get out of the house and to have something for himself. But I’ll speak about myself because I don’t know if it is man or woman. What I do know in parenting and having four children and multiple businesses. It’s a demanding life I live and a good demanding life. It’s a beautiful privilege. I know I have to be intentional at all times. My mind can drift very quickly. I can be sitting at the dinner table. My intention is enjoy conversation. And all of a sudden you have a download of, Oh, I should post this tomorrow and quickly. I’m like squirrel, I’m over here thinking about that. And I have to pull myself back. It’s a practice. And I also think it’s a time to give yourself that radical self-acceptance to go, Oh, you know what? I was a little distracted tonight. It’s okay. What can I do now to either make up for that or be better in the moment.
Mike Ayala: That’s awesome. Let’s dive into your background a little bit because I mean, this was awesome and we could spend all day here, but I really want to know a little bit more about you. So, tell us what you want to tell us.
Jen Szpigiel: I’m an only child, which I’m still processing too. That’s been a unique upbringing. So, anybody who’s an only child, you would be able to understand, it’s not true what they say about only children that we are greedy and selfish. As a matter of fact, I think we’re opposite because we never had to fight for anything. You know, we never had to fight for that last piece of bread or that toy. So, I have been brought up with a very generous heart. My parents divorced when I was young. That wasn’t necessarily hard on me, to be honest with you. I don’t have any harsh feelings. They weren’t meant to be together. And I knew that at a very young age, and I think being an only child, you’re around your parents so much that you do feel the energy. I quickly grew into a very insecure young woman, very insecure and just constantly looking for people to like me. And when you’re looking for people to like you, the interesting thing is you end up attracting the opposite. The people who maybe don’t approve of you or are judgmental. And it just affirms that inside feeling that self-limiting belief that you already have; I was just mirroring what was inside of me. And so that was a huge hurdle to overcome as a teenage girl, teenage boy, teenage girl. That is just an awkward time in life. We don’t know who we are. We’re just trying to fit in, you know, be the cool kid, but not too cool. And so that led me to a pretty wild teenage life. I was definitely someone that you couldn’t keep down. I was out and doing all sorts of things, but it evolved. All of that was so on purpose, because it evolved me into this young, very young woman who thought I don’t like how I felt in my body as a teenager. And when is it hitting around 18, 19, I thought there’s got to be other girls who feel like me. I can’t be alone in this. And I just had this. It was like a drop. Let’s just a little download, little bit of guidance intuition that said, I just want to help women feel confident in their own skin because this doesn’t feel good. And I went into the fashion industry because I loved fashion. I was kind of known for that, the girl that had nice clothes and I loved to dress. It was just a passion of mine, but that industry ate me for breakfast. It was very cutthroat, very superficial, very political. I just, it was just not my scene at all. So, I realized my love of fashion and clothes didn’t translate into the industry. And I took a really radical flip over into the technology industry and started doing marketing for big companies. So, ones that you would all know. And because I was a consultant, I have a non-disclosure, but I worked heavily with them. And I just loved it. I loved what I did. I loved marketing. I was doing really cool things around world. I had that cubicle job, but at 20, 21 years old, that cubicle felt like a corner office. I loved what I did, and I quickly got married and had a baby and I was not ready for motherhood. And I wasn’t ready to be a spouse. That was me not being sure of myself and standing in my truth. I knew and not the person I just knew I wasn’t ready, but I didn’t have the voice or confidence to say not right now. Like, I love that this is a part of our future, but not right now. I didn’t have that in me. So, went with the flow, even though I knew, Oh Jen, like I had that loud voice. I just didn’t pay attention. And so, I had this little girl in my hands and bless her because she has really walked me through the life of motherhood. She has been so kind, she has been just such a big, big influence. There’s another influence in my life, of really helping me to feel love, to give love without any expectations. And that was such a huge piece for me that was missing. So, motherhood led me down this path of thing you want. I don’t even want to work. I want to be home with her all the time. So, I left my career and now I’m a mom of four. I started in network marketing by accident. I was definitely not someone who would ever consider network marketing. I thought it was below me. I would hear it was this big marketing career before I’d left. And that was for stay-at-home moms who had nothing better to do. I had really poor examples and experiences of network marketing with other people. So, I didn’t even attend their meetings or events. And I was hired actually by a company to go launch from the corporate side. And I went and I was like a fly on the wall. And I became so inspired by these women. And at this time, it was a very female dominated company, but they were all co-parenting, and they were making ridiculous money. They looked good; they were vibrant. And at that moment I was a stay at home mom who completely lost herself. I was miserable. I loved being home with my kids. It had nothing to do with that job, but I had no concept of who Jen was anymore, other than that. And so, I joined the company without trying a product. It was simply like, I don’t know what this is, but I’m signing up. So, such a flip, it’s such a contradiction of who walked in that, you know, that event and who walked out, and I built it to the top of the company. It didn’t take long. It was just, I had something for me, and it made me passionate again and excited to go out and fill those gaps that I had of being around adults and stretching myself. That’s when I fell in love with personal growth and development and I realized, oh my goodness, hold on a second. I’m a mom and a wife and a career woman. Like you actually can have it all because I’d lived in the belief where you had to choose, you either chose to be successful in career, or you chose to be home with your kids or have like this, you know, be home basically with your family. And this completely destroyed that lie I had told myself. So, I was really passionate about this experience for other parents, men and women. I’ve definitely mentored both and it grew. And then there’s a point where I told you earlier on, I mean, I’ve been doing it for so long. It was well over a decade. And there was just this rumbling and me again, Jen, come on. There’s more like, what are you going to do? You’re 38 years old. You’ve been sitting in this for 10 years, making a very healthy income time freedom, financial freedom, traveling. All of the things I was living. I was an example of, and I thought I’m only 38. Am I going to do just this forever? And that was a little bit I don’t know, ruffled feathers. Let’s just say that. Cause you know, you’re making other people look and go what you’re mean you’re not comfortable. This isn’t enough. And so, I just took a real bet on myself and I went out there and I became a certified life coach, a certified health coach, and then it evolved into business coaching. And now it’s just turned into this beautiful business of service. I was just named by Yahoo finance and Fox and NBC and CBC as the top business mentor for 2021. Just feels good. Like life feels good.
Mike Ayala: That’s awesome. You were talking about that rumbling. And I think a lot of times there’s a lot of people probably listening that, suppressed that. Do you agree with that? Like I think so many people suppress that feeling.
Jen Szpigiel: I did for years. I did for years; I knew this wasn’t my be all and end all. It was a vehicle to more but having that need for people to approve of me, kept me still. And I think that is really probably if we’re all being honest, the main reason we don’t act out on these things, what will my wife say? Will it hurt my marriage? What will my parents say? What will my coworker say? Will I hurt my job? So, all these what ifs, we what if ourselves out of decisions all the time. And I always have said to myself, but Jen, what if it does work? And that was always stronger than all the other reasons why it may not.
Mike Ayala: And I think that’s why it’s so important to get it. Like you were talking about leaving your phone off in that quiet time. And really I put this post up a couple of weeks ago about, you know, I don’t know if this is true or not, but you know, people use such a limited amount of their brain. And the reality is I don’t, whether we actually do or don’t, I don’t really know or care, but the reality is that’s our conscious. In order to really get into those questions that you’re talking about, we have to find time and dig deep within us. And I remember a time just probably a year and a half, two years ago where these limiting beliefs, these things and wherever they came from, whatever it was created, I found myself saying, you know, I should just be grateful with what I have and I should be with what I have. But it had put me into a place of stagnant. I was stagnant and I was feeling guilty because I wanted more out of life. And I found myself in this place where it really kept me grounded in a bad way from listening to that rumbling. And so, what do you say to people that are in those places they’ve suppressed that rumbling?
Jen Szpigiel: Well, I would say this, in our humanness, we put lids on ourselves. We’re constantly not enough-ing. Or I should, I would say the same thing as you, Mike, I should be happy with what I have. I mean, this is incredible as the 1%, but it wasn’t enough. And that was like this almost, it could almost feel and I’m being honest, almost like torture, right? Cause it’s like, I should be happy, but there’s more, but I should be and so it’s like this conflict in the body and I went to this incredible training. It was all about spiritual intelligence and especially with leadership. And he said something that completely changed my life. He said we were born with infinite possibilities and potential. It is in our humanness that we close those things off and think we don’t have the capacity. We don’t have the time. We don’t have the support. We don’t have the financial backing, whatever excuse we’re leaning into. It’s actually not true. And when you just decide to almost surrender in a way, I mean, you’re not going to surrender where you’re going to sit on the couch and say, I’m manifesting an eight-figure business. I mean, it’s not that simple. It would be nice, but it’s not. But what I do think is when you surrender to the idea, so you start taking small incremental steps towards that goal or desire, miracles start to unfold. The little, like, almost like that article that was just written about me is like, you’re on the right track Jen. See, here’s, I call them God winks. Here’s a little God wink for you that you’re on the right track. It’s like that cute little wink, you know, that you’re doing the right thing. And I look for those and I see them all the time. And the more intuitive, the more in tune you are with yourself, oh man, the expansion of yourself is just, Oh, it can be addictive almost because what aren’t we, what isn’t possible for us.
Mike Ayala: Yeah, totally. And you know, you said something earlier on in the beginning of the show about, you know, coming from a place of who you’re becoming and the thing that I’m sitting here thinking about as I’m listening to you, what if you hadn’t listened to that rumble, you know, how many lives are you changing? What if you hadn’t stepped into that? And so, it’s almost like we’re selfish. If we don’t beat that and move out of that, like who are we robbing? Because you’re part of a lot of people’s future and their growth and their purpose and their passion. And if you become selfish and you stay where you’re at, you’re literally stealing from people that you were designed to create hope for. So, Kara talks about that a ton and I love it. And I’m just thinking about you and had you not answered that how many lives would not be changed?
Jen Szpigiel: Well, yeah. And Kara and I shared the same mentor, who probably said the same thing to her that she did to me. She said, if you stay in this realm of network marketing, it’s so small and not everybody wants to do a business like that. And if you took yourself out, how many people could you impact, exactly what you just said, Mike. And it’s taking, you know, somebody might think, well, that’s selfish, that’s ego. You want to be big or popular or no, actually it’s quite the opposite. It’s about not about me, but looking outward of how can I make impact? How can I be a living example to others that inspire them to maybe do a little bit more, you know, the slight edge is such a good book. Like there’s just that slight edge. It doesn’t have to be leaps and bounds unless you’re that person. I tend to be that person, but you could be the slight edge person. Just do a little bit more today than you did yesterday. Just a little bit, one more call, one more minute on the treadmill. One more minute tucking your kids into bed. You can put this on all areas of your life. And that starts to add up those small incremental steps Add up to big things.
Mike Ayala: I love that. One of my favorite quotes is, that’s actually probably my favorite quote, Zig Ziglar quote. You can have everything you want in life if you just help enough other people get what they want. And just back to that, it doesn’t matter if it’s network marketing or following your, that rumbling of, you know, becoming a life coach. It’s really, I think a lot of times people are looking, they’re looking at all this wrong. Like what are you taking from somebody? And I want to ask you a question about network marketing, because I hear this a lot. But the reality is like, as a coach and answering that rumbling, it isn’t about what you’re getting from your clients. It’s back to Zig Ziglar. The more you can give and help people answer what they need out of life. That’s where you get back. And I don’t think people have that abundance mentality, but real quick on the network marketing thing, I love, I mean the whole point of investing for freedom is multiple streams of income. You know, I’m like, I will die on this sword. You cannot rely on your W2 income. And even if you own a business, that should not be your only source of revenue, because if something happens to your business or the EPA comes in and shuts you down or external forces, like I don’t care if it’s a business, even investing, you get over into the investing quadrant, you better not have everything wrapped up in a single stream of investment. So, I actually really appreciate and love network marketing because it is one of the easiest and best ways to not only get passive income coming in. Well, I don’t know if it’s really passive, whatever we can talk about that, but also the support. Can you talk to that a little bit because there’s this, there’s this idea out there. So many people think it’s just a fraud and it’s a scheme and you can’t be successful at it. I don’t agree with that. You probably don’t.
Jen Szpigiel: Yeah. Well, I’ve been in the industry for 15 years. It’s definitely a passive income for me now. It’s just, it’s a big blessing in my life. And I built that. I created that. Here’s the thing about network marketing and here’s how I’ve explained it at forever. Some people do it in a really poor way. There are some fanatical people. I call it ignorance on fire. They have never run a business before, you know, maybe they had a job, whether it’s like a nurse or maybe they’re a stay-at-home mom, or maybe the gentleman’s like in accounting, never run some sort of entrepreneurial business and you give them this opportunity and they have no skill set. Maybe not even people’s skills because they haven’t been in that type of environment before. And they can do it in a very wrong way that makes people feel like they’re being hunted. And so, I’ve always said to people, I really like hockey. So, I remember the first time I went to a hockey game, there were these two guys, no shirts on, they were like big dudes, bald heads. And there were painted blue and white because I’m from Toronto, Toronto, maple Leaf’s, like you better like them or you know. And so, I remember looking at them as just like almost freakish, like what is going on? And I remember my dad saying something to me. He goes, you know what? They just love showing it. They show it in a different way than you and I, but it doesn’t make me less of a fan. They’re just really boisterous. And I actually take that to network marketing. There are those people who are going to paint themselves in their company and be loud and proud. And that could be a big turnoff. It’s not to everybody, but most people I think it is. But then you have these people who genuinely want to build an income stream in the nooks and crannies of their day, they’re working full-time, they want to be part of their family’s lives. COVID I mean, has there ever been more relevant time to build something online than this year? It’s just proven that this is so essential and just learning those skills. So, I want to say, I’m sorry. As a part of the industry, I’ve been a part of this industry for a long time. I’m sorry for the times that it may have been done wrong, but that doesn’t make the industry wrong. That was that person, that was that experience. And I had them too before network marketing. I was that person who thought no way, would I be associated with that? And then here I am. So that’s the simple answer to help people maybe soften their edges. And to know that there are people out there who really do care about the product and impacting others. The other thing about network marketing that I think is misunderstood, as they say, Oh, you get paid on all the people below you. I love that one. So, I think people don’t understand again. I mean, the income you earn as a leader is earned. You spend so much time pouring into people and building leaders and building their belief and teaching and training. I mean it’s hours upon hours of doing that for free. Nobody pays you in that business to say, okay, you’re leading these hundreds, thousands of people, the company doesn’t give you money for that time. That’s the expectation. And so how you are rewarded is making a commission on the sales of your organization. It takes nothing away from that person. She makes exactly the same commission you make, nothing to do. There’s no cuts. I think that’s a misunderstood thing. I have a cut of her pay. Absolutely not. She makes, or he makes as much money as I do. It’s just longevity in the business. Of course, I have a bigger business. I’ve been in it 15 years, you know, than someone who’s done it for a year. So, these little things that are just, I believe, lack of understanding and knowledge that are quite powerful when you look at it.
Mike Ayala: Well, and I think that you just brought up such a valid point in anything because so many. And I talk about this a lot, but you know, we talk about how we make $25 an hour or whatever, and that’s just not true. We earn by trading our time for money. And so many people don’t really understand that if what I’m hearing is that, I mean, those people were going to buy whatever product they were going to buy anyway. And it’s weird when you have to shift the thinking. And most people just can’t do that without really slowing. Most people don’t want to do it. They have such a poverty, adverse mindset that they can’t work through that. But the reality is you’re not taking anything from anyone. Someone’s buying a product and you’re getting paid a commission essentially on somebody buying that. Like, it’s just so crazy to me, but I don’t want to argue with fools.
Jen Szpigiel: Oh, I’ve had lots of those. I’ll tell you lots of those lots of attacks online, especially when I was very vocal about my network marketing business and still actively pursuing that. A lot of people and I just, I would always respond. So, if there’s any network marketers listening in, I want to give you this, like drop this tip for you. The best way to respond to someone who’s negative or confrontational about the industry is to say, Oh, it sounds like you have a story. I’d love to hear it. It’s so good. Because it is a story. They are, they have their backup. They’re defensive. They’re angry because somehow, sometime somebody did it poorly. Maybe they had a bad experience, or someone was, Hey, haven’t seen you since high school, I have a business. I think you’d be great at like, really poor relationship building. So I get how that could stir somebody, but instead of being defensive back or the industry, which I see a lot of this, like back and forth, but it’s this, no, it’s not, take that away and just say, Hey Mike, it sounds like you’ve got a story. I’d love to hear it and let them vent. Half the time they just need to tell it.
Mike Ayala: That’s so good. So much wisdom. And I really wanted to number one, you’ve been at it forever and you’re an expert there, but I think there’s so much opportunity for people, you know, stay at home mom or they need a second stream of income. Or even if they’re working two jobs, maybe they can eliminate one by building their own team. And so, I really appreciate you know, just kind of uncovering that. So, I’m going to let you take us wherever you want to take us because we’ve got, I mean, we could talk for hours, but it’s getting close. And so, what do you want to share? What do you want to talk about?
Jen Szpigiel: I think if I could maybe just share what’s going on inside of me, because I know I’m not alone in some of the things I’m processing 2020 has been like a feral year, just so much to overcome and understand and unpack, and it could leave us feeling like we want to be in the fetal position on the couch with a big blanket and a bottle of wine and a bag of chips. I’ve been there in 2020. I’ve been on the couch where I felt like what is even happening. So much uncertainty. And you can quickly go down that negative spiral of just feeling not enough. Scarcity, worry, fear, rejection. Oh, I just can only imagine the amount of anxiety in people’s bodies. Instead, I would encourage you to look at it with a fresh set of eyes. Look how resilient we have just proven we are, our strength. I would assume someone listening in, maybe you’ve had a really difficult year and I don’t want to diminish those feelings or that journey or path you’ve been on or hurdle, I guess is probably more like it, but you don’t always stay in the Valley, but the valleys are necessary in life. You even said earlier, you know, 2020 is revealed in us this ability to work and be with family and have kids crawl up on our lap and just accept going with the flow. And I would love to see us close this year off and open up 2021 with this like warrior armor on us. Like, look what I just did. Look, what did we just walked through? And how can we now pursue all these lessons with love and generosity and accepting each other and knowing we process things differently. But then this like this posture, like I say, this warrior posture of like, wow, we are strong. We are courageous. We were able to pivot and shift and tweak. Even today. I just found out the schools are closing down and we’re going into lockdown. That just happened today. And I think, Oh my goodness. Well, it’s just another one of those opportunities for me to go, okay, you know what? This is reality. This is situation. What can I do? And it has built my confidence in myself. It really has shown that you can do just about anything, Jen, and that’s not a Jen thing, that is each of us making that choice to stand in our power.
Mike Ayala: That’s so good. And I constantly talk about this five-part formula, which I’m not going to get into, but the last part of it is adjust. And the reason, you know, I’ve had so many people tell me, well, once you set your goals, you stick to it. You know, what I just heard you say though. And yeah, when we were setting our goals and when we’re going after something, we have to go after it. But I think so many people don’t want to change, or they had this idea of what something was going to look like. One of my, this is a scripture I’ve been thinking about a lot lately. And I want to get your take on this based on what you just said, hope deferred makes the heart sick. And I feel like, like you bring such a Ray of hope and energy and life to what I mean, I’m excited to listen to this again, but hope deferred makes the heart sick. And what I just heard you, I mean, you just gave us a bunch of hope, but people have to mind that out of them because they all can’t. I mean, they can follow you on Instagram and they can come and hear your message and everything else. But for the person who’s lost their hope, how do we get into that warrior? I mean, I just love the way you did that. That was like.
Jen Szpigiel: The whole thing.
Mike Ayala: Yeah. Like for somebody that’s, it literally makes the heart sick. And it breaks my, because I think so many people have lost their hope because they had this idea of where their life was going, and outside forces come in. But we decide what we’re going to do with that. So how do, give us some advice on how to get into that warrior mentality.
Jen Szpigiel: Yeah. I have a podcast I recorded on this called victim to Victor. And when I recorded the podcast, I had this image in my head of myself when I was in a really low time. And what I know when you’ve lost hope or in a low time, you feel lonely that nobody understands. You know, you’re looking for someone to rescue you. You’re looking for a Ray of light and this is the most important time to look in and not out. It is the most important time. And it’s literally a decision that I am going to be a Victor. This will not take me down. I have worked through things. I even went through an exercise where I wrote down. It’s not a pleasant one, but it’s really good. I teach it at my life coaching, writing down things you’ve got through in your life.
And some of it’s traumatic. Some of it’s hard, some of it’s dark, but when you look at all the things you’ve worked through, there is this level of confidence that starts to exude like, Oh, I made of something. I’ve got grit. I can, I have and making a decision, even if you don’t feel like it. Because if we wait for the feeling, you’re going to wait forever. If you’re waiting to be inspired or waiting to be motivated, it’s never going to happen. It’s going to happen. And this was my image of crawling out of the pit. And I thought of like nails with dirt under them, where you’re just trying to get out of this pit and crawl out and it feels treacherous. And it’s like, can I make it? And you’ve got skinned knees and you just feel not in a good place, but you can make a decision to start climbing out. And as you start to climb and you start to see the light, like there’s going to be these flecks of light that happened because you’ve made that choice. All of a sudden, the inspiration, the motivation, that grit in your belly starts to come forward and come forward. But I’ll tell you right now, if you sit in the victim, that’s one of my biggest regrets. I know we do so, let’s just own it. So that’s one of mine is I sat in that pit, poor me. Someone help me, look what they’re doing to me. And there was so much emphasis on the outside and so much ego involved. That’s a whole other conversation, but make the decision, make the choice and don’t wait for the feeling. And then once you start, you’ll see, you’ll see what you’re made of.
Mike Ayala: Wow. That’s amazing. Well, I might have to have you on my podcast once a quarter, just to pick me up. Like I’m feeling like I could take on the world. So, your podcast is called becoming iconic as I think everybody can hear and see and feel, it’s a perfect name. So, if you want to become iconic, let’s go find Jen and you can get a dose of this every week. How often do you launch podcasts?
Jen Szpigiel: Every Monday and Thursday. Twice a week.
Mike Ayala: Where else can people find you?
Jen Szpigiel: They can come hang out on Instagram and it’s Jen Szpigiel. So, J-E-N just one N, S-Z or Z, depending where you live. P-I-G-I-E-L and then my website’s the same www.jenszpigiel.com. And there’s lots of stuff there. And my website, because I’ve done this for so long. I really built it for the people out there who are interested, there’s blogs and resources. It’s not just sales pages. It’s really built to build community. And the same thing goes for my Instagram page. I love showing up there. That is a love for me. So that is not a half to every day. It is a pure joy to build community over there.
Mike Ayala: I love it. Well, and I mean, I’ve been watching your stuff lately and it’s the same, it’s energetic. It’s uplifting. So, I appreciate you, any final words that we didn’t cover that you really need to say?
Jen Szpigiel: Well, I just want to say, thank you. Thank you for showing up. You and your wife are incredible human beings that I’m so grateful to have met in 2020. And this opportunity means a lot to me. And I just want to thank you for what you’re doing and bringing to the world.
Jen Szpigiel: Well, thank you. Jen actually promoted my podcast when we launched and I have all these followers from Canada that listened and I’m like, what is this? And so, I appreciate that.
Mike Ayala: Yeah, no problem. No problem at all. We are neighbors, but more together and aligned than we are separate that’s for sure. And we in Canada have felt the things you have felt, maybe not to the same extent, but it has been a close journey for us as well. And just know that the world is our oyster right now. I mean, Canada, US, Europe, Australia, gosh, like gets me so excited because there’s no borders, no boundaries anymore. And now it’s just up to us to stand up in that and take advantage and impact.
Jen Szpigiel: It’s so true. I saw that early on in all this, I mean, I don’t think the world’s ever been in a situation where the world was battling something altogether at the same time. So, it’s an opportunity for us to come together and really make some amazing things happen.
Mike Ayala: I agree. I agree.
Jen Szpigiel: Well, thank you so much. I honor your energy and your passion and everything you do. So, I appreciate you.
Mike Ayala: Thanks, Mike. I appreciate you too.
Jen Szpigiel: Thank you.